New format, same problems.

Actually it hasn't been all that bad. I've just been under a really dark cloud for a few months. I attribute this to the funerals I've been too but I don't think that's it anymore. I feel like I'm just tired to hitting my head on the glass ceiling. It's just...really difficult for me to want or even try to do that anymore.
The first thought, is why the hell would you do that in the first place?! Maybe being broke for so long has gotten to me but fuck that. No reason to put up with the sheer amount of BS I have to for no good reasons. Also saw on facebook a guy I threatened several years ago. He's apparently a friend of a friend. It was over my ex-wife. The reasons I don't think I'll ever know and after talking to her more I can say that I still love her but don't know if it's been enough time for all those wounds to heal. There were a lot of them. And in case you were wondering, the offer still stands.

Another month, another wake.

The streak is still going strong. This past March my Uncle Eugene (Hong) passed away. Not more than 2 weeks ago. It was a rough one. As the service was in my old church-I haven't been there in a long time. It feels like at least 2 years or so but it's probably longer than that. It should be noted that I don't have a problem with God. Far from it. We get along great-except for that whole mega millions numbers thing. Haha. It was the pastor at the old time strong-arming senior citizens to vote. It was redorkulous, Balky. That's why I stopped going. Whoever that guy was/is is not the pastor anymore. Still weird seeing some of those people. They all got old and short. 

This past week, an old friend of my dad, James Leong passed away. (and when I mean old friend, like old village in China kind of old friend) He wasn't doing well (on life support). I didn't know him that well and always found it super weird that he sounded different in person than on the phone. For a bit of history, he was one of, if not the first Chop Suey restaurant in the St. Louis metro area. Mid 1970's or so, in case you are keeping track. I doubt he invented the St. Paul but I didn't get to ask him. I think it would have been cool to know at the very least. In any case, I'm probably going to have one for him. I think they both deserved better than what they got. Or at least the way they went out. 

I seem to be saying that a lot. Rest easy you old goats.